I'm a simple girl with a li'l dream, of seeing her humble works in exquisite print, to share with all who feels for words, written with
an unsupressable urge. So indugle in my fantasies, and plow your way through my memories, greatly appreciated you will be,
if you can leave your comments here for me.


Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Men Are Just Happier People


What do you expect from such simple creatures?

Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be President.
You can never get pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. Hell, you can wear NO shirt
to a water park.

Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal. You never have
to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress: $5000.00. Tux rental: $100.00.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.

The occasional well-rendered belch is not only appreciated by your friends, but practically expected.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck. You can play with toys all your life.
Your belly usually hides your hips.
One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24th in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.

14 comments:

Cavalock said...

Geez, i'm a guy but i think i can only agree/relate to like 10% of all that. seems like a very ang mo-ish list...

ethan said...

I agree with cavalock too, seem to be more western and Asian in views.

David said...

It only means that men are simpler, not necessarily happier... :)

Richard said...

Your last name stays put.
Sofia did not change her surname and I had no problems with that. Interestingly, of all my friends who have married, only Asian women (whether born in Canada or not) have changed their surname. Everyone else has kept their surname.

The garage is all yours.
Err ... no, the wife likes to store stuff in it.

Wedding plans take care of themselves.
What plans?

Chocolate is just another snack.
Not when you are a choco-vore.

You can be President.
I seriously doubt that. My surname precludes that. Besides which, in Canada, we have a Prime Minister.

You can never get pregnant.
Will the injustices never end?

You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. Hell, you can wear NO shirt to a water park.
In the province of Ontario, woman are allowed to be topless in public. They won that right in December 1996 (Gwen Jacob). I have yet to see a topless woman walking around in the summer, though.

Car mechanics tell you the truth.
Really?

The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
Not if I have to sit down.

You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
So you are saying that men instinctively screw?

Same work, more pay.
I should certainly hope not.

Wrinkles add character.
Not in my case.

Wedding dress: $5000.00. Tux rental: $100.00.
That is why weddings should be T-shirt and shorts with a potluck to follow.

People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
At 184cm, they just look up my nostrils.

The occasional well-rendered belch is not only appreciated by your friends, but practically expected.
Not around my table.

New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
That is your choice.

One mood all the time.
I’m working on fleshing out my character and personality.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
Women I know have worked hard to "fix" that.

You know stuff about tanks.
Err ... o-o-o-kay

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
Why so much?

You can open all your own jars.
You could too if you’d eat all your spinach.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
This is were men and women differ. Women give one point for any act / action. Men assign points on the size of the act / action. For a woman, 1 rose = 1 point; 12 roses = 1 point; paint the house = 1 point; take out the garbage = 1 point. For a man, 1 rose = 1 point; 12 roses = 12 points; paint the house = 50 points; take out the garbage = 1 point.

If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
It’s your problem.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
Oddly enough, I just picked up 3 for $5.99

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
I’m a pair short. Two pair short if you consider shoes that I normally wear.

You almost never have strap problems in public.
Go strapless.

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
They are not wrinkles, they lend the clothes a casual ambience.

Everything on your face stays its original color.
This I don’t get.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
Maybe in my case, but men are surprisingly vain.

You only have to shave your face and neck.
Not because I want to, but because the wife wants me to.

You can play with toys all your life.
And women get to play dress-up all their lives. Fair trade, methinks.

Your belly usually hides your hips.
At this point in my life, I would gladly trade my belly for some hips.

One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons.
I find a wallet to be too much accessorizing .

You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
Trust me, there are guys legs I wish I had never seen.

You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
What’s wrong with the teeth?

You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
So do Italian women.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24th in 25 minutes.
Not if there is a long queue at the checkout counter.

Midorinosora said...

That's true, but being a man seems damn boring. I'd choose to be a woman anytime!

r_goh said...

Now we know why the term "Gay" only applies for men.

Elvina aka LaoNiang said...

Hahah Richard your answers made me laugh out so loud that I have goo coming out of my nostrils. By the way, I am impressed that you are such a bargain hunter where your briefs are concerned!

And yes, men instinctively 'screw'! I LOVE THAT ONE! :P

Richard said...

I think that was more gooey detail than I needed to know.

Iceman said...

Please la. Where got men happier? I heard there was this survey done where they discovered women are happier ... no kidding ...

Nyokk said...

umm relating to this facts, dont think it's applicable to all men but does not necessarily means they are happier, thanks for sharing :D

老星洲 said...

This big list, only 30% are accurate, the rest are not true. Perhaps we are standing at different angle and at different gender to view each other.

One thing for sure, men does not need to suffer pain from mensuration and pregnancy while women does not need to suffer hell from BMT/NS training.

luvphobia said...

neh neh ni boo boo~

trust me, we men have our own share.

Whiskoffee said...

Wow! A blog entry full of complaints! =) Hah...

mistyeiz said...

haha!! what a coincidence! i have this on my blog too... :)